Week 13 is over. My finals are over. I’m left with a multitude of time to ruminate on the last several months of FF, and boy howdy is that the best Christmas present I could have asked for. The River Gypsies are not going to the playoffs. The River Gypsies are not going to the playoffs. The River Gypsies are not going to the playoffs. For the first time in the history of our league, RG will not be competing for a championship. For the first time in the history of our league, the defending champion did not make the playoffs. For the first time in the history of our league, I don’t have to pay Gentry a dime for this season. Can I get an Amen? Perhaps an Hallelujah? We really might be finally ending the two-pronged reign of IO and RG over the Red Zone. If so, it’s been one hell of a ride. Of course, with IO coasting nicely to a bye, perhaps the Red Zone isn’t quite out of the woods just yet. There may be light at the end of this five-year-long tunnel, but perhaps it’s just another train coming. Oh, and is this a good time to mention that there is now one sole team that's made the playoffs every year? Yes? Okay. There is now one sole team that's made the playoffs every year. And it's the Indian Outlaws. So, now that we’ve seen how this 2016 regular season shook out, I thought it might be fun to revisit my Draft Recap post from August 31st. We can dwell on all the predictions I made that were spot on, and maybe briefly gloss over all the ones where I was dead wrong, if we’ve got time. But first, we have two notables to cover: Worst Move of the 2016 Regular Season: Where else could we possibly look than the fateful RG-BCH trade? In hindsight, trying to be “ahead of the curve” on Demarco Murray’s regression to the mean turned out to essentially doom RG’s season. Trading Murray for Hopkins was bad enough, but to also throw in a WR, one that would surpass Hopkins all on his own? That’s what turns this from a bad move to an abysmal one. Kudos G. Runner Up: As amazing as it is, another RG trade is the runner up this year. The Dez-Wilson-Starks for Adams-Cam-Forte deal literally caused him to drop just enough points to miss the playoffs in the final stretch of the year. Had RG kept his original crew, he would have snuck into the playoffs. With the trade? Sorry G. Best Move of the 2016 Regular Season: With as one-sided a trade as the aforementioned RG-BCH deal, technically this should go to BCH. And in spirit, it will. But since I already covered it, I’m foregoing that choice for a different one. Evan, just know down in your heart of hearts that this is also your award. But beyond that, the best move of the season goes to NSA for picking up Spencer Ware before Week One. This one sticks with me personally, since I had also submitted a waiver claim for Ware post-draft, but NSA had that waiver advantage. NSA rode Ware to a league-leading 1665 points, and essentially saved his season with how Charles/McKinnon/Crowell turned out. Having a reliable RB2 all season for the cost of an early waiver claim was a move that turned NSA into a powerhouse. Well done, Mike. Runner Up: It wouldn’t be an IO write-up without a nice ol’ pat on the back. So here goes. Grabbing Jimmy Graham off waivers back when the Seahawks still didn’t have much of a passing attack turned out to be as good as gold, with Graham being the highest-scoring TE since the pick-up, with Graham ending the regular season as the #3 TE overall. Alright, so now we’re through that. Let’s go through the teams according to their points-scored and see how my predictions turned out. #1. Northside Angels What I got right:
What I got wrong:
#2. Indian Outlaws What I got right:
What I got wrong:
#3. The Mullynation What I got right:
What I got wrong:
#4. Big City Hillbillies What I got right:
What I got wrong:
#5. Twin City Tree Cats What I got right:
What I got wrong:
#6. Suzy’s Pancakes What I got right:
What I got wrong:
#7. Troll Hunters What I got right:
What I got wrong:
#8. River Gypsies What I got right:
What I got wrong:
#9. Vicious Veg-Heads What I got right:
What I got wrong:
#10. 90 Degree Putters What I got right:
What I got wrong:
Holy shit. That was soooooo long. Wow. But now it’s done! So yay, you each got your own little slice of personal attention. I think overall I had more hits than misses, but some of those misses were baaaaaad. The Theme TimeOkay, so here’s the fun part. Now we’re switching gears to a lighter-hearted part, and not so grounded in facts. Facts are boring. Being subjective is fun.
Now, the question is, if you were a Disney Princess, who would you be? I think it’s safe to assume we were all thinking it. Now let’s break it down. Oh, before we go any further, obviously I’m only going to do this sort of in-depth analysis for the worthy teams: the playoff teams. Clearly, the non-playoff teams are not of princess caliber, so you’ll just have to take the bone I throw you at the end. Deal with it, dipshits.
For you non-playoff bottom-dwellers:
Aaaaand now we’re done.
0 Comments
|
By: Hayden HansonMr. Hayden Hanson (Editor in Chief) is an Accountant-extraordinaire, as well as an aspiring writer. He has written several moderately-successful self-help books, the most famous of which is "What Do You Mean You Can Smell My BO?" Gustav Travers of the New York Times praised the book as "A vulnerable, courageous look into the mind of a man who has literally no sense that other people exist. And also no sense of smell. Nope, he definitely doesn't have that either. Just musk, like a hog that's gotten into the cabbage." Archives
September 2019
Categories |